True Fact #43 (Part Two)

...that Barack Obama solved the mystery?

True Fact #43 (Part One)

Did you know...

True Fact #42

Also his favorite genre of music.

True Fact #41

Barack Obama has a big head lately.

True Fact #40

"Sara, take me home tonight. I'm a man!"

True Fact #39

Greatest Moments:

1. First time doing a flip into a swimming pool.

2. Turning the ignition key of first car.

3. First born's first steps.

4. This.

True Fact #38

Guest written by Violent J of the Insane Clown Posse.

True Fact #37

Gross.

True Fact #36

Obama is tracks.

True Fact #35

Wait...hold on—take me—wait...take me ho—wait...hold on. Fuckin' shit.

True Fact #34

Barack Obama hates that shop class is now called Industrial Arts. Also, he hates Nascar.

True Fact #33

Barack's future is so bright, he has to wear stupid sunglasses.

True Fact #32

Slow ride, take it easy.

True Fact #31

The Secret Service was all like "Dude, it's gonna make the place look trashy."

True Fact #30

Barack Obama is a spinster.

True Fact #29

This actually happened to us.

True Fact #28

Barack likes to watch.

True Fact #27

Gimme five, man!

True Fact #26

His daughters' bedroom eventually started to look like the inside of the machine.

True Fact #25

A skill Barack Obama perfected on long flights.

True Fact #24

"What's the big deal?" Said Barack, "They got 'em in gyms, right?"

True Fact #23

Ain't no boobs like Hawaii-style boobs.

True Fact #22

The day Barack Obama quit thinkin' Elvis was even cool in the first darn place.